Men and Engagement Rings

This article is... well... too stupid for words, but I'll address it anyway. Its what I do: contend with stupid people.

The article is on, shock above shock, Yahoo's "Shine" site. Shine is like an angry young female blog that contains a mixture of lust, jealousy, bitterness, scorn and disgust at the "plight" of the modern day woman, whatever that is. The fact that statistics screamingly declare Western women have made more socioeconomic progress than any other human being on the planet over the past 30 years is completely ignored. Mainly the articles sound like what they are: a bunch of spoiled, over-indulged 26-35 year olds whining about having too many choices and not enough mystery Marlboro men to sweep them off their feet.

This particular Shine whine is about the unfairness of men not wearing engagement rings. Apparently its only men's good fortune to be required to spend 10 grand or more on a stupid rock for a person who will leave you after marriage, statistically speaking, 50% of the time. Under the circumstances, it seems to me that men should be the ones whining. Its not uncommon for a man's ex to keep the ring that represented his love for her, if the union fails. Despite being out 10 g's, having his heart broken, and potentially facing ruinous child support and alimony (yes, it still exists) payments, it is the ex-fiance or wife whom your heart should bleed for dear reader, didn't you know?

Why?

Because HE is not being "forced" to wear an engagement ring.

Oh, horror.

Refuse to give an engagement ring fellas. Let me know what kind of response that gets you from your sweetheart. Disgust, tears, and confusion to name a few. Want to solve this "problem" ladies? Fine. Buy us a ring. And please note we WILL be showing it to our friends for bragging purposes so you better drop at least 10k. Borrow it if you don't have it. Let's go. And don't give me any of your piddling excuses. I've seen your handbag and your designer shoes. I know you have the money. Don't be a cheapskate. Oh and if things don't work out, you can bet we're keeping our ring.

Despite women crying for equality, as I've mentioned before, women are not after equality. If they were, men would receive a ring too. A nice one. In platinum or gold. And we would be equals. Yup. Hasn't happened yet, though. Because it never will. Women want to be courted and to them that equals a man spending a boatload of cash to impress them while expecting nothing but her smiles in return and perhaps a very quiet "thank you." Certainly no promises are given and a girl is free to date others, after all, isn't she? I mean if he "wants it, he better put a ring on it." eh ladies?

Men in fact, don't mind spending money on their sweetheart. What else are we going to do with it? There are only so many rare baseball cards we can buy. No one holds a gun to our head. Men like to spoil their darling girl. They love being Mr. Bigshot (if they can). They know they're expected to be. They long to be that guy. The problem is that it is more and more challenging for a man to be that person. Thanks to a handful of greedy, corrupt alpha males at the top of society, bending, breaking and making new laws as they see fit, the lions share of the resources in any country quickly go to the top few percent while the rest of the men scrounge to make a living. Most women have no idea that's happening and role their eyes while muttering things about "ambition" while keeping their hard earned dollars squarely in their designer handbag.

So, Ms. PJ Gach, if you'd like a REAL debate on rings, promises, duties, responsibilities, obligations, and whatnot between the genders, before, during, AND after marriage, then please start talking sensibly, STARTING with what you intend to do to deserve any ring OR ANYTHING else AT ALL from us men. Presently, women are a tremendous LEGAL LIABILITY to men after marriage and children and men are taking more risk by marrying then women are and that is a PROVEN FACT.

So when he falls to his knees and offers you his heart, his life, and 10k worth of a stupid rock, why don't you show a little gratitude and just say "yes." Men don't get married with the intention of getting divorced, so calm the fuck down for a second and quit suggesting he's just dying to cheat. Some guy, once upon a time, that talked to you in a bar (talking isn't gratuitous sex, lady) isn't every man ever born. Not to mention I also have been personally hit on by women WHOSE BOYFRIENDS I HAVE MET. So I wouldn't act too high-and-mighty if I were you. If you want fairness, REFUSE THE RING, or better yet, BUY AN EQUALLY EXPENSIVE ONE FOR HIM. Whining that you're being forced to wear some man's $10,000 dollar present isn't a fine pillar to be standing on.

-JB